The Fleshy Robots
If you're working with us, these are the people you'll have to tolerate.
Jessica Schnehage Operations Lead
Came over from the music industry managing artists. Hyper efficient and more skilled than she should be at quickly separating bowls of M&M's into colors.
Jessamine County Production Manager
Alongside Jessica, Jessamine makes up the symbiotic hive mind we call "Jessus". Together they make sure that the girl in the red dress is in the right place at the right time and prevent glitching out black cats.
Ross Allchorn Founder, CEO
Spells ecommerce without capitalizing it, hyphenating it or any other way that might make him look daft. Catches more plastic bags than fish. Has delicious plastic bag recipes.
Julian Schnehage Developer
Shreds on a guitar and is Andy Zaltzman punny. Keeps us entertained with a never ending stream of developer memes.
Ian Jamieson Project Hero
Lives in the past and communicates with us through advanced time defying technology. Still manages to design and code most mortals under the table.
Alfredo Pantoja Developer
One of the longest standing members of the team and our go-to guy when things get complicated. Alfredo is a digital nomad and rarely in the same place when you speak to him.
Chris -if that's his real name- is tight on security. So cautious is he, that he refused to have his photo or surname published live. We're legitimately considering the possibility that he's actually a rogue fork of AlphaStar.
Linda Lynch Marketing Coordinator
Despite being the 1939 extreme lawn bowls world champion, Linda doesn't allow this to go to her head. Ever humble, she coordinates our marketing like a well aimed holding shot that lands 1mm from the jack.
Wouter Burger Analyst
We think the movie Good Will Hunting was based on Wouter and suspect all his windows are covered in equations. He's proof that the matrix could be true.
Daniel Connor Copywriter
He’s been called ‘the word-slinger.’ Mostly by himself. He identifies important bits, leaves out the other bits, finds a creative hook, then puts the ‘OH!’ In SEO.
Gabi Falanga Copywriter
When not hiding in bushes to get exclusive shots of Peter Parker in his red spandex Zentai suit, Gabi can usually be found behind the typewriter producing sensational pieces for The Daily Bugle. Her side hustle is writing pieces for us.
Christopher Mills SEO & Online Marketing
We found Chris naked in a basket on a river bank which was kinda odd since he was already a fully grown adult man with a wife and kid. We don't ask questions, especially since he's so damn good at SEO.